I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize