i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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