I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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