How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Randomize
