he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
