And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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