I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
