Someone shit on the floor
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
BRING THE BAGELS
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
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