What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Actions speak louder than pants.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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