RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
