I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize