He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
