We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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