he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
