I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
now i know why i became what i already was.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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