I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
