Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
