Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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