told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
