oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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