i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize