Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize