i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
