Umm I'm too high to move.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
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