The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She told me I should be a condom model.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
