is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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