My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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