do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
how does that bad decision feel?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
