can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
