Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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