Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
