Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
