I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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