i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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