i don't like sucking hair
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
