Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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