Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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