I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
