girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
