Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
