she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize