all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
