I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
