My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
