if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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