well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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