Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
