I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
