My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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