We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
