Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
