You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize